What Rejection Doesn’t Mean

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Perhaps there are some of you who will be showered with roses, buried in chocolates, and bombarded with affection today. Swoon! There’s no use pretending that romantic love isn’t amazing. It is one of the best gifts God has designed for His children.

But some of you will be forced to spend this romantic day without romance. For you, this date on the calendar may feel like it needs to be rebranded as National Rejection Day.

Whether your love walked away or never noticed you to begin with, the end result is a feeling of rejection.

Rejection is lots of things. It’s disappointing. It’s painful. It’s hard to get over. But sometimes the enemy uses rejection like a balloon animal, shaping and twisting it into an even bigger monster. That’s why when we face rejection, we need God’s truth. Here are three things rejection isn’t.

1. Rejection isn’t proof that you’re unloveable.

Don’t let one person’s opinion of you warp the truth. You are deeply loved. There are no candy hearts or Hallmark cards that can make statements as powerful and profound as these.

But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (Eph. 2:4–5).

“The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing” (Zeph. 3:17).

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you” (Jer. 31:3).

Perhaps the object of your human affection doesn’t feel the same about you. That doesn’t mean that no one ever will. Since the beginning of time, God has declared His everlasting, steadfast love and commitment to you. You have proof that you are loveable because you are so deeply loved.

2. Rejection isn’t unique to you.

Today, as you look around, you will see couples everywhere. It may feel like the whole world has found love except you, like you’re the only one dealing with rejection on this day designated to warm fuzzies. That can lead to a pity party with a capital P. But the truth is when you face rejection, you’re in the best of company. God’s Word describes Jesus as “a living stone rejected by men” (1 Peter 2:4) and reminds us He was “despised and rejected by men” (Isa. 53:3).

That rejection you’re feeling today, He felt it, too. He chose to suffer in that way so that you and I would not ultimately be rejected. Which is why . . .

3. Rejection is not forever.

Because of the cross, the Father has not rejected you, but has welcomed you into the family of God.

You may continue to face romantic rejection. Even after marriage, the object of our affection won’t always see things our way or look at us through the eyes of love. But that doesn’t mean that true acceptance is as unlikely as finding a sale on roses on Valentine’s Day. You’re already accepted. Because of the cross, the Father has not rejected you, but has welcomed you into the family of God.

Go on and bust out the heart eye emojis. This is the best love news you’ll ever hear.

And you, who once were alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds, he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him (Col. 1:21–22).

A Valentine’s Day Challenge

Yes, rejection stings. There’s no sense pretending that it doesn’t. But if you’re feeling rejected today, don’t let that balloon into something it isn’t. You are loved. You are accepted. You are in good company.

So now what? Here is a Valentine’s Day Challenge for you.

Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God (Rom. 15:7).

Instead of responding to rejection by withdrawing, reach out. Find someone else who might be hurting today and seize this opportunity to share Christ’s love.

I’d love to hear about it in the comment section below.

About Author

Avatar

Erin is passionate about pointing young women toward God's Truth. She is the author of several books and a frequent speaker and blogger to women of all ages. Erin lives on a small farm in the midwest with her husband and kids. When she's not writing, you can find her herding goats, chickens, and children.

HEY, GIRLS! We love hearing from you, but feel limited in the ways we can help. For one thing, we’re not trained counselors. If you’re seeking counsel, we encourage you to talk to your pastor or a godly woman in your life as they’ll know more details and can provide you with ongoing accountability and help. Also, the following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate. We may edit or remove your comment if it:

  • * Requests or gives personal information such as email address, address, or phone number.
  • * Attacks other readers.
  • * Uses vulgar or profane language.