From the LYWB.com Team: We love our readers! We asked you to submit guest posts to help us explore the topic of studying God’s Word. You did! We received awesome posts from places like India, Scotland, Morocco, and the good ol’ USofA. We will be featuring some of these posts this month. Here’s one from Aliyah . . .
My heart has been hurting a bit these days because I know I have so much inside of me that needs to change. I don’t know how God’s going to work it all out. Things like pride, resentment, and arrogance build up in me, reminding me I’m still so broken.
I have these conversations with God, telling Him I have nothing left that’s any good at all. I probably sound a little like this: “I gave you all I thought you wanted. . . . Wait, what was that? . . . You want everything? Even the worst parts?” I run and hide, sometimes, from the God who made me.
Why He Won’t Take My Excuses
I still wonder about this: Does He really want to see my brokenness? Does He really want to do something with me? Have you ever felt like that?
Then my mind flickers back to the beginning of Jeremiah, when God speaks these wonderful words,
“‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations’
‘Ah, Sovereign LORD,’ I said, ‘I do not know how to speak; I am only a child.’
But the LORD said to me, ‘Do not say, “I am only a child.” You must go to everyone I send you to say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you'” (Jer. 1:5–8a).
These verses gave me a lot of comfort, which leads me into the reason why I read God’s Word.
I read God’s Word because I know He’s not going to take my excuses for an answer. I know He’s going to keep reassuring me as He did to Jeremiah . . .
- “I know you”
- “I have still chosen you.”
- “I’m the One who made you this way, don’t you think I know how to use you?”
The God Who Made the Stars Doesn’t Need My Permission
I so need the reminder. The last couple of times God’s asked me to do something, I’ve been more like, “Umm . . .You sure about that?” It sounds ridiculous; because, of course, God is sure about it! He has everything perfectly planned out. It reminds me of my dad, who showed me something he’d done recently. I told him, “That’s fine,” to which he replied, “I wasn’t asking for your approval, I was saying this is how it’s going to be from now on.”
I read His Word because it’s the answer to my questions.
The way he said it made me laugh, but this truth rang clear to me: God is in charge, not me. Yet my itty-bitty human brain seems to think the Maker of the stars needs my permission to work in and through me.
I read God’s Word because I need to be reminded that He wants to use me, even when it doesn’t feel like that could possibly be true. But that’s not the only reason.
I go to His Word because I have been changed for the better by listening to Him tell me His grace is sufficient for me, that there’s still good in me that He sees (Isa. 65:8). I read His Word because it’s the answer to my questions.
- Yes, He does want to use my weaknesses, my brokenness (2 Cor. 12:9–10).
- He knows the plans He has for me (Jer. 29:11), both in this life and for all eternity.
- His ways are higher than mine, and so much better (Isa. 55:8–11).
- His promises are tailor made for my life in Him (Eze. 36:25–27).
I don’t know the stories of my sisters in Christ reading this. I don’t know what kind of life you’re living, what kind of struggles you’re facing. But I know this much: We are sisters because the Maker of the stars has made us new. Will you join me in letting Him direct our weakness, as only He can? Will you join me by going back, time and time again, to see what He has to say in His Word?
About Aliyah: Aliyah Burton is a homeschooled fourteen-year-old follower of Jesus Christ. She enjoys writing on her blog and in other forms, playing piano, and learning guitar. Her first novel, Sunrise, will be self-published by June 2015, and so in the midst of trying to finish that, she seeks the truth in her weakness daily.