When the Compliments Don’t Fix the Insecurities

From the LYWB.com Team: To celebrate the release of their new book, we’ve turned the blog over to the ladies at Girl Defined this week. You already know Bethany; she’s a regular contributor to this blog. She runs Girl Defined with her sister Kristen, the author of this post. Learn all about them and their new book here.

The compliments didn’t fix it. The modeling offers didn’t make it go away. The attention from cute guys didn’t make it any better.

I liked most everything about my physical appearance except for this one thing—my nose.

I often sat in front of the mirror staring at my face, wishing I had a different nose. I would pinch it to make it look more slender, questioning why God didn’t make that one easy adjustment.

I was sixteen years old and had unknowingly bought into lies about my beauty. I wasn’t the only one. All my friends seemed to be discontent about something on their bodies, too.

I was so focused on me, the creature, I forgot to acknowledge the Creator.

Years later, God opened my eyes to the root of my insecurity. The heart of the matter wasn’t a “bad nose” but an ungrateful heart toward the Creator and Designer of my body. I was so focused on me, the creature, I forgot to acknowledge the Creator (Rom. 1:25).

My eyes were slowly opened to the many subtle lies I believed about my identity as a woman. Even though I loved Jesus, I realized that I had allowed other influences to define my womanhood outside of God’s Word.

A Brave Step

Staring into a mirror wishing for a new nose may seem like a small thing, but it really opened my eyes to how easily I could be swayed by lies and how often I look to others to define my beauty and worth as a woman.

I didn’t want that to be the pattern for my life any longer, so I decided to do something brave. Instead of looking to myself or to others for answers, I decided that God’s Word would be the foundational source for my definition of womanhood. God would be the only One who would define my femininity. It would
no longer matter what Hollywood said, what chick-flicks promoted, what Nashville produced, what magazines displayed, or what professors taught; God’s Word would now be the sole foundation for my identity.

The more I understood and embraced God’s design for womanhood, the more joy-filled and content I became.

That choice plunged me into the most counter-cultural, yet totally fulfilling, swim of my life. I devoured books on the topic of biblical womanhood and studied everything the Bible taught for women. (Check out Proverbs 31Titus 2, and 1 Timothy 2:9 for a few of my faves.) I wanted to know everything I could about God’s design for my life!

And you know what? The more I understood and embraced God’s design for womanhood, the more joy-filled and content I became.

No More Nose Insecurities!

That one bold choice to let God’s Word define my identity has lead me on a journey to experiencing God’s transforming peace ( Isa. 26:3). The more I define my femininity according to God’s Word, the more
content I become. No more nose insecurities!

If you want to reap the benefits of living a God-defined life, you will have to make the same brave choice I did to swim against the popular current and to stop defining your life according to anything other than God’s Word.

In our brand-new book, Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity, we
show you exactly how to do just that! If this post has sparked an interest in you to learn more about God’s amazing design for womanhood, grab a copy! This is the book I would have devoured when I first started looking for answers about God’s design.

Here’s a sneak peek into the book that I’d like to challenge you with:

God is looking for women who will be brave in today’s society. We’re challenging you to be one of those women. To be one of the few who are willing to liberate yourself from the commonality of wimpy womanhood. Our generation is in need of Christian women who are willing to rise up and show the culture the powerful influence a God-defined woman can have.

Will you be a brave woman? Let’s chat some more in the comment section below!

  • If you had to be honest with yourself, are you brave or wimpy when it comes to embracing God’s design?
  • From where do you currently get your definition for womanhood?

PS: We’ll be hosting an eight-week LIVE webinar study this summer studying biblical womanhood and
using Girl Defined as a guide. Spots are limited, so register soon if you’re interested.

About Author

Guest Blogger

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