Yesterday I asked for your definitions of a fierce woman, after introducing you to Kimberly Wagner’s new book Fierce Women. You came up with some great answers!
It was Kimberly’s fierceness that first attracted her husband-to-be, LeRoy. We pick up that story here.
Why is fierceness in women appealing to men? I think they like a challenge. They admire the strength, courage, loyalty, and determination of a fierce woman. They like spunk and passion. Fierce women don’t grovel for their attention and aren’t desperate for a man to meet their deepest needs. Men admire a woman who doesn’t depend solely on them for their identity or happiness.
The truly beautifully fierce woman has an otherworldly strength derived from a source beyond herself. She’s plunged in fully to the forgiveness and love of Christ, and He holds her heart so completely that she’s reached true contentment. Her identity is forged through abiding in Him, and her courage is displayed by her commitment to Him and His cause. He is her driving motivation and propels her by the wind of His Spirit. Her passion is stoked by His fire. She is no "halfhearted creature" but is drinking deeply of Him and experiencing infinite joy.
She is a warrior at heart—not violent or aggressive—but tempered by humility. She’s a soft warrior; fleshing out the beauty of fierceness in her daily life. Loving God and others with sacrificial devotion. This is the kind of fierceness I’m talking about when I said I love to see a fierce woman in action. I strive for this ideal. (Fierce Women, 19–20)
A fierce woman sounds like something I want to be! How about you? How do we know if we are the kind of fierce women that others will be drawn to?
Kimberly gives us this checklist:
- Her identity and value are rooted in her relationship with Christ rather than a relationship with a man.
- She’s filled with gratitude for God’s good gifts. Her heart is ruled by the peace of contentment.
- She courageously faces her fears rather than running or hiding in shame.
- She’s passionate about things that matter rather than living for the trivial.
- She loves God and others. She’s more focused on giving love than getting love.
- She’s willing to battle for a worthy cause rather than shrinking in defeat.
- She grabs the hem of God’s will and doesn’t let go.
- She protects and defends the helpless rather than using her strength to bully others.
- She is known as a sincere encourager.
- She’s honest but kind.
- Others feel comfortable in seeking her counsel.
- She embraces God’s Word as her ultimate authority rather than being swayed by the voices of the culture.
- She faithfully confronts by speaking truth in love rather than enabling sin by keeping silent.
- She walks in confidence and humility that flow from her recognition of Christ’s work of grace in her life.
- She has the power to influence and inspire because she lives under the Spirit’s control.
- Her life is lived all out for God’s glory rather than the smallness of self.
Go back and use that list like a quiz. Give yourself an A if you’re doing excellent in the area mentioned, a C if you could use some improvement, and an F if you are way off from the standards of a fierce woman. (Don’t worry, I won’t show your parents your grade!)
If you’re really feeling brave, talk through this list with a friend or family member who knows you well and ask them how they think you’re doing in the fierce woman department.
If you find you’ve got some work to do, take this list to God and ask for His help to become the fierce woman He designed.
I’ve still got one free copy of Fierce Women left to give away, so as a reward for bravely putting yourself under the microscope, I will choose one winner at random to send it to. Leave us a comment below for a chance to win.